Usually, we do what we WANT to do. We buy what we want to buy. We do things we want to do. We spend time with people we want to spend time with. We do things selfishly. If we have a slight “guilt” about doing something we kind of think we shouldn’t, we simply justify it to ourselves to make our conscience feel better. Many times we do this subliminally in the depths of our minds and we don’t give it enough of a chance to bother us enough to not indulge. Remember, we want to do it.
Think about that Sundae at the restaurant. You just finished a big meal and are stuffed. However, we see that decadent mouth watering chocolate fudge sundae on the dessert menu. You know you shouldn’t get it but you justify to yourself that you “deserve” it. After all, it has been a rough week at work and it is a free dessert that comes with the meal and you wouldn’t want to waste free food, right?
Another way we justify our actions is by avoiding things we don’t want to do even if we should. This can be more of a problem for us especially in terms of personal growth. How many times are we asked to help a friend or family member or asked to volunteer at our kid’s school event and in our head we immediately start searching for the most palatable excuse we can to use as a reason we can’t do it. The bottom line is we don’t want to help and we try to come up with a good enough justification to not feel guilty. However, many of these actions that we try to avoid are actually great for personal growth.
Stretching ourselves and doing things we don’t want to do or are uncomfortable are the exact things that make us better.
Next time you are asked for a favor or some help with something, don’t try to figure out the best excuse to avoid it. Find a way to tackle the challenge. You will be amazed at how much better you feel after you do and how much you grow. You will probably actually enjoy it too!
No more justifying your excuses. They are just selfish justifications.